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Beyond schoolbooks and better syllabi: sex education needs a digital boost

Last November, Sunway University’s Peer Counselling Volunteers (PCV) held an event tackling mental health and relationships. I decided on an unconventional topic: staying safe (and sane) on online dating apps[1].

 

While there was lighter content (differentiating red flags vs. the “ick”?), I also shared the National Health & Morbidity Survey (NHMS) 2022 findings on adolescent sexual behaviour, where[2]:

  • 33% of teens who have had sex did so before turning 14 – below Malaysia’s age of consent (16).
  • 88% did not use condoms or any form of birth control.
  • 11% reported having multiple sexual partners.

 

In today’s digital world, Malaysian youth aren’t learning about sex from schools or credible online sources. The NHMS findings indicate a youth segment that’s having sex earlier and riskier, amid a sea of online trends that misinform and skew perceptions.

 

  1. OnlyFans and the mainstreaming of sexual content creation and monetisation

 

For many, porn is an accessible (but unreliable) source of sex education. Consent, mutual respect, and contraception are dismissed in favour of unrealistic and often degrading scenes.

 

The rise of OnlyFans has normalised sexual content creation and monetisation in a way that may appeal to some teens, because they see their peers or micro-influencers earning from it. While “camming” existed in adult-only spaces, OF creators actively promote their accounts by cross-posting teaser content on IG, TikTok, and X.

 

Has our sex education caught up to the concept of digital sexual labour and its impact on Malaysian youth? Case in point: according to Bukit Aman Criminal Investigation Department director Datuk Seri Mohd Shuhaily Mohd Zain, a nine-year-old girl reportedly offered her body in a gang rape to repay a debt[3].

 

  1. The manosphere

 

The manosphere is a loosely connected web of online communities for men and boys. They claim to promote masculinity, brotherhood, and self-improvement through fitness, finance, and hobbies.

 

Dig deeper and you’ll find misogyny. Men must assert dominance; emotions and vulnerability are shamed; sex is seen as a right, not a choice. The manosphere harms male survivors of sexual violence by framing them as weak, while female rape victims “deserved it”. Instead of helping boys grow, the manosphere conditions them to feel aggrieved, inadequate, and hostile towards women.

 

If this sounds like a “Western” problem, be wary – manosphere influencers like Andrew Tate have Malaysian fans[4]. Tate currently faces charges of rape, human trafficking, and organised crime to sexually exploit women.

 

  1. The “tradwife” (traditional wife) trend

 

On the surface, the tradwife seems like the millennial/Gen Z version of stay-at-home moms who cook, craft, and blog. The difference is tradwife’s perpetuation of gender hierarchies: men lead, women submit[5].

 

Tradwives claim they don’t work because their husbands provide 100%. In truth, they’re actively filming, editing, and curating social media presence that is monetised, contrary to the single-income idea that they preach.

 

While not overtly sexual, tradwife messaging misleads girls into prioritising men’s comfort over their goals, dreams, and more importantly, financial independence. In Malaysia, the movement doesn’t need to go viral – existing gender hierarchies hold back survivors from reporting or leaving abusive relationships.

 

Embedding digital literacy into sex education

 

Through the Selangor state government’s Akademi Kepimpinan Wanita (AKW), I mentored a group of 4 women leaders, who organised a digital safety workshop as their final project. It attracted a full house of over 200 parents and children. However, more needs to be done besides advising parents to “communicate more” or monitor their children’s online habits.

 

Embedding digital literacy in sex education includes:

 

  1. Digital autonomy: Teens must know what they’re consenting to online, safeguarding their digital footprint, the rights they have over their digital bodies, and how to seek help in case of revenge porn or digital abuse.

 

  1. Legislation that treats digital assault as severely as physical assault. In 2024, UK police investigated the online rape of a girl’s avatar in the metaverse[6]. Her trauma was equivalent to trauma from a physical rape, due to the use of virtual reality (VR) during the assault. More recently, a male student from Foon Yew High School in Kulai, Johor, was accused of creating deepfake pornographic images of schoolmates and teachers for sale online[7].

 

  1. Creating a virtual One Stop Centre (OSC) that contains medically sound, engaging online content that busts myths, promotes mutual respect, and encourages safe sex practices. This can be done in collaboration with established NGOs and advocates like Monsters Among Us, KRYSS Network, and the Federation of Reproductive Health Associations, Malaysia (FRHAM).

 

  1. Facing harmful narratives head-on and teaching students to critically examine depictions of sex in culture and media.

 

Conclusion

 

The internet isn’t going away – and neither are OnlyFans, the manosphere, or tradwives. It’s time to bring sex education out of the textbooks and into digital spaces where young Malaysians are already asking questions, taking risks, and looking for answers.

[1] Instagram. (2020). Lim Yi Wei | 林怡威 on Instagram: “Get your dating tips from a YB! (Kidding, not kidding) Talking safe sex, consent, and boundaries at Sunway University’s Peer Counselling Volunteers (PCV) programme titled “Heartbreak & Hiccups” – check it out”. [online] Available at: https://www.instagram.com/reel/DB_acJ0SYzu/ [Accessed 23 Apr. 2025].

[2] CodeBlue (2023). NHMS Survey: One-Third Of Sexually Experienced Malaysian Teens Had Sex Before Turning 14. [online] CodeBlue. Available at: https://codeblue.galencentre.org/2023/05/nhms-survey-one-third-of-sexually-experienced-malaysian-teens-had-sex-before-turning-14/.

[3] Sinar Daily Reporter (2024). Easy access to social media, pornography causing social problems among children | Sinar Daily. [online] Sinar Daily. Available at: https://www.sinardaily.my/article/217787/focus/national/easy-access-to-social-media-pornography-causing-social-problems-among-children [Accessed 22 Apr. 2025].

[4] https://www.facebook.com/thevibesnewsmy (2023). Love him, hate him: Andrew Tate gains foothold in M’sian men’s psyche. [online] The Vibes. Available at: https://www.thevibes.com/articles/news/82857/love-him-hate-him-andrew-tate-finds-foothold-in-msian-mens-consciousness [Accessed 23 Apr. 2025].

[5] Travers, M. (2024). A Psychologist Explains The Dangers Of The ‘Tradwife’ Movement. [online] Forbes. Available at: https://www.forbes.com/sites/traversmark/2024/01/06/a-psychologist-explains-the-dangers-of-the-tradwife-movement/.

 

[6] Vallance, C. (2024). Police investigate virtual sex assault on girl’s avatar. www.bbc.com. [online] 2 Jan. Available at: https://www.bbc.com/news/technology-67865327.

 

[7] Mail, M. (2025). Foon Yew principal resigns as school faces outrage over mishandled sexual misconduct scandal. [online] Malay Mail. Available at: https://www.malaymail.com/news/malaysia/2025/04/19/foon-yew-principal-resigns-as-school-faces-outrage-over-mishandled-sexual-misconduct-scandal/173633 [Accessed 22 Apr. 2025].